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[ now for something completely different ]

Tyr had never been on a train before, much less one that ran underground, but that was the first thing he noticed as he heard the doors slip shut and a sudden jolt shook him awake. Hard benches, yellow lights, and windows that didn't seem to look out onto anything.

The next thing he realized was that even if he didn't know what he was on, he knew that bit of knowledge was irrelevant.

More than anything else, he felt emptiness. Neither wanting nor satisfied, neither comfortable nor uncomfortable. Nothing. It wasn't just that he lost the Soul Eater - though he didn't need to check his hand to be sure it was gone - but he didn't feel himself either. At best, it left him uneasy.

All around him, all he could smell was something like wet cement, and while windows lined the train, all that he could see out them was an unchanging darkness. There were a few other people on the train with him - some laying down on the hard plastic benches, some still staring out the windows, others that were awake and talking with each other - and he was somewhat relieved that he didn't recognize most of them. Maybe they were okay... That was all he could hope for the others.

As for the person next to him, though...he didn't know if it was foolish to even have hope for him to begin with. Was this Tyr's fault or was it meant to happen whether they met or not? He knew Ion's fate from the start, but he still really wished...

Shaking his head of that regret, he placed a gentle hand on the other boy's shoulder. "Ion."

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Tyr's voice wasn't enough to convince Ion that things were entirely acceptable. He was even losing control of his voice near the end. It was impossible to ask Tyr to not be troubled by what was happening. They were taking a ride somewhere because of their choices. And if only Ion had been less pressed with the situation. Tyr's own life being tossed away so easily was still because Ion had been involved. There was a very thin light to all of that.

He straightened up, "I can always count on Tyr McDohl. It's why we are here. I could truly rely on you to work with me."

There were many people to blame. Maybe he could accept his own death all over again but for Tyr that was too much. He led Tyr along with his own guessing from the very beginning. And now he couldn't even offer any compensation. But there was something that he learned from Tyr which would have Ion extend his hand to lightly touch the other's.

His eyes flickered down to his hand when he felt Ion's fingers touch it. It was a gentle touch, and right now, it really meant something to him.

"That's...right," he replied quietly, worrying his voice might break again if he spoke up. When Ion said it like that, it at least made him feel a little better about his own circumstances. Right, it was honorable to die when they working together for what they believed in. It wasn't a war, but it was nevertheless an important mission.

Maybe if he looked at it that way, everyone could forgive him for dying at all and losing the rune. If he knew this would happen, he could have passed it on to someone else.

Ion deserved so much more, though. He couldn't be the only one helping Tyr. After a long pause, he looked back up to Ion's face and continued, "I'm sorry this had to happen, Ion... I never...thought it would come down to this..."

His hand would be drawn back after Tyr got out what he could. Ion slowly shook his head. It would not be fair to let Tyr believe all of what he said. Death would have been faced whether or not Holly Heights was a factor in things. But it certainly did feel too early for Tyr. Though it would have been too cruel to ignore what Tyr was thinking as they only shared the same miserable aspect. He only looked back at the other.

"It isn't your fault, either. It may be easiest if we both took responsibility. At this point it may be of little matter and the same with apologies."

And yet saying that wouldn't do any good for Tyr's own mind. It wouldn't stop Tyr from thinking and it wasn't as though things were going to be easier to accept despite there not being anything to be done. That had to be the most frustrating aspect of it all. Ion could only sit beside him and welcome a not so comforting death.

"...But I know you don't deserve any of this."

"Neither do you," Tyr replied without hesitation, finding strength in his voice again. "Not before and not now..."

Even without knowing the circumstances of Ion's death, if they were going to talk about deserving to die, he was confident that Ion should have been able to go on living. At least for as long as Tyr had. With their fates already sealed and blame being meaningless at this point, maybe arguing about this was the only think he could fight for.

Maybe he needed to truly take the time to appreciate the sentiment as opposed to belittling every little thing that had been going through Tyr's head. It was not as though there was any reasoning to be cruel now but the other never had given him reason to. It would be further from how he felt and it was best to be honest with where they were.

"There is nothing else to do besides wait."

Make desperate last minute wishes? Think about every other minute and how it could have been done differently? There was much more that one could do while sitting but it would not make much of an impact.

He wasn't going to argue with him, at least, which was some weight off Tyr's shoulders. Even if Ion wasn't agreeing with him either. It wasn't as though Tyr could force Ion to believe he deserved to keep living.

No, they were going to talk about something else now. Tyr's expression fell, eyes narrowing.

"...For what?" he whispered uncertainly.

What was waiting for them?

How long would they need to wait for it?

But in the end, Ion was right. There was nothing they could do but sit and wait for the inevitable stop of the train. It didn't matter if either of them deserved to die.

"For when it is absolutely necessary to stand."

To stand up and get off the train. But who said that the train would actually come to a stop? Maybe it would go off far and they would be no need for that. It was more of a matter of awaiting for something to happen. Possibly their minds would abandon them or there simply would no longer be any room for feeling anything negative.

For someone who has died once... Ion has little knowledge on the matter.

"It will seem that you won't ever stop looking for answers."

Tyr wasn't sure if Ion was criticizing him by saying that, but hearing Ion say it still made him feel off.

"I should still be able to say that about you, too..."

And with that, he turned away from Ion again to sit properly in his seat, face forward and still frowning. He wondered how much Ion knew, if this was like the death he experienced before. If it was, it was cruel of him not to at least tell Tyr what was waiting for them when they would have to finally need to get up and leave. This was still scary... Even if Tyr wouldn't let him know he felt that way.

» where the tall grasses wave

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